PUSLINCH – Men’s sense of purpose after retirement can be challenging but especially if men are isolated in rural areas, loneliness can creep in.
Cheryl-Lyn Milani wants to change this by creating a community for men through a Men’s Shed. There are groups across Canada and the rest of the world for men to get together whether it be for a coffee, making things in a workshop or exploring nature.
Her dad inspired her to start a Men’s Shed in Puslinch. She thinks if after he retired he had a group like this he would have benefited from socialization. He has dementia and to see him deteriorate and isolate was alarming for her.
“I lost my father three years ago, even though he's still here. And it's like watching him struggle with that loss of purpose, loss of ability, loss of in some ways, his masculinity in his mind,” said Milani.
When Milani went to Australia to visit her daughter she found out about Men’s Shed. It was founded by a woman in the 90s at an activities centre for older adults. Maxine Chaseling was a coordinator at the centre in Goolwa, Australia and she is credited for starting the first shed. It began through her experience working with older adults and seeing her dad’s depression set in after retirement. Knowing a woman started the shed movement, it felt less odd for Milani to start a men’s group as a woman.
Before Men’s Shed was official, there were similar meetings in the late 70s and 80s with retired miners and veterans from the Vietnam War, described on the Men’s Shed Canada website. In Canada, the first Men’s Shed started in 2011 at the Woodhaven Community Club in Winnipeg. By 2020, 35 sheds formed across the country.
The goal of the Men’s Shed Milani started is so rural residents can age in place and have a sense of purpose in the community. “A lot of people that lived this way really struggled to go into our typical retirement home scenario because they chose not to live in the city their whole life, and now they're going through a crisis point,” she said. A crisis of aging while also transitioning into living in an urban setting.
The “shed” at 1241 Concession Rd. 10 is Milani’s family farm. The farm was purchased in 1972 and her parents still live on the property in a log house her dad built. It’s 100 acres with a wood shop, machine shop and lots of nature. Milani thought with the space and tools that aren’t being used and considering the upkeep the farm needs, what better place to facilitate a men’s group.
Puslinch Men’s Shed ramped up in the fall after the first cohort of men branched off and created other groups in places like London. It’s open to anyone and people don’t have to be retired to join. It has 35 members and there is a newly formed wood working group of five men.
Group facilitator Jon Gil recently retired from a career in mental health and knows the benefits of what socialization can do for men. He wants the shed to be a place where people can learn from each other by contributing their skills.
Member John Yang feels the same way. Woodworking is his hobby and he wants to be able to hone in on the trade. He’s retired from being a geriatrician and with his free time he was looking for something to do.
“I recognize the struggles that people have, particularly with loneliness, as they get older. It's being more recognized, like social isolation has a big impact on health. I thought this was a way I might be able to contribute or participate,” said Yang.
Bob Prentice is new to the area and he joined to make new friends with shared interests. Men don’t go out that often and just talk, he said.
Milani is working to get a not-for-profit up and running so 15 sub-groups within the shed can operate. In the group of men there is a chef, lathe turner, and a welder.
Since there are people without their driving she wants to find a way for them to get to the property. Another idea is to have mobile units where members can go out and fix things at people’s homes who are isolated or widowed.
Gil thinks by making contributions within the community it's a way to give back to themselves. “We don't learn and grow if somebody's doing something for us. So get guys in there and show them how to do something, and it increases our value,” he said.
